I Formed a Party with a Girl via an Adventurer Matching App - Chapter 11

 A Catastrophic Sense of Fashion

"To start off, regarding you forming a party with me... you need to throw away every single piece of clothing you currently own." 

"You want me to roam around outside naked?!"

After taking a bath with Cordelia, who had begged me to Wash my back, okay? ❤️ (※Note: some of my memories regarding her exact phrasing may be slightly blurred by my own desires) and where things obviously didn't just end at washing her back (※Note: we did it twice), we welcomed the morning fully refreshed.

Currently, Cordelia and I were sitting on the very same L-shaped couch where we had shared those passionate kisses last night, both clad in matching white bathrobes. Apparently, lounging around in a bathrobe after a bath was just her standard routine. Do people like that actually exist in real life? I thought they only existed in fairy tales about royalty and nobles.

For the record, the one I was wearing was a larger size that she had accidentally bought in the past, which I was now borrowing. It was my first time ever wearing a bathrobe, and it felt like I was just walking around in a giant towel. I couldn't really relax.

Cordelia, on the other hand, looked incredibly elegant in hers, as expected. Perhaps still a bit flushed from the hot bath, she had the front draped open quite boldly, giving me a perfect view of her pale-pink-tinted breasts peeking out from underneath.

As I stared intently into that deep cleavage, she poked at the ice cream she'd had delivered via Uber Bird with a wooden spoon and spoke.

"I acknowledge your strength as an adventurer, but even so, your look is just catastrophically tacky." 

"Is it really that bad?!" 

"That silver-and-yellow striped body armor? Throw it in the trash immediately. And that heavily worn-out shirt that oozes poverty—the one that looks like a country peasant bought it while trying way too hard to look cool, where you can't even tell what color it originally was? Throw it away. Your pants don't even fit your leg length and look ridiculous, so throw those away too. And the mere thought that you wore underwear beneath all that gives me the shivers, so throw those away as well." 

"Aren't you laying it on a bit thick?! Is my outfit really that terrible?!" 

"You honestly hadn't noticed? It's atrocious."

U-Ugh... She was completely tearing me to shreds. Was it really that hopeless? Well, I personally don't know the first thing about fashion, so I just bought my gear purely based on its defensive stats. I honestly couldn't tell what looked good or bad.

I mean, I'd gone out on countless adventures wearing that silver-and-yellow striped body armor. Believe it or not, the thing was actually advertised as reversible—the inside had a red-and-pink horizontal border pattern. Granted, because it was made of solid iron, the fact that you couldn't actually flip it inside out was its biggest design flaw.

While I was having a massive existential crisis over my own fashion sense, Cordelia muttered a small, "Thanks for the food," and popped the lid back onto her ice cream. She ran her tongue over her lips, licking away a stray bit of white cream from the corner of her mouth.

"Wait a minute! Didn't you say right before the bath that you'd give me a bite of your ice cream?! I haven't gotten a single taste yet!" 

"Did I say that?" 

"You did! Don't act like it never happened just because you got greedy while eating it!" 

"Oh, shut up." 

"Isn't it a bit unfair that I'm the one getting yelled at here?!"

As I pressed Cordelia for my share, she suddenly looped her arms around my neck.

"Eh...?!"

And as if mocking my instant panic, she brought her face right up to mine and—

Smooch...

...gave me a kiss.

It was soft, sending a sweet, intoxicating jolt of electricity straight to my brain. Immediately after, the sugary aroma of vanilla tickled the back of my nose.

"There. That counts as your bite."

Cordelia looked down at my lower lap—where a glaring erection was clearly visible even through the thick fabric of the bathrobe—and let out a wicked, amused chuckle.

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